By Julia Clare and Virginia Johnson
*Edited following a PA training group protested the article – I am sure they wouldn’t want the truth out there.* See Pics 😉
For all that is good and holy – some PA’s are the most self-absorbed, self-deserving human beings in this industry. I have been a PA for almost 2 years. I am not PAID. I work 24/7 and the job is not that freaking hard! Julia is a PAID PA and has been for longer than I. We have seen some shit over the last 5 hours that made the hair on the back of our necks stand up. Even my blood pressure made an appearance as we researched PA’s and their inability to accept the fact they are not the center of the indie world. Guess what? You are the right hand to the author that you work for, not the financial inconvenience on an indie writer.
You as a PA, should be ashamed of yourself for some of the prices that you are willing to charge. I don’t give a shit what minimum wage is, you sit in front of a screen and run an event. Maybe post every hour and set up a few graphics that are all the same because – well, it is fkn easy. And YOU want to make $200 an event? What? Am I in the twilight zone? Is this what we in the indie community have boiled down to? Scamming an indie author out of their hard-earned money, for what? For you to make a small fortune doing what I do for free?!
- PA’s can make or break an author – Especially, debut authors.
Over and over it has been said, a pimper does not equal a PA. You cannot offer your services as a PA when you do not know what the position requires. You quit your job and now you’re bored? Naturally, Monday morning you wake up and say, “Hey, today I think I’ll run a magazine.” Most are laughing or thinking, ‘Do what?’ This is my point. You can’t wake up and decide, ‘Hey, I’m now a PA, where’s the money?” (Don’t worry that topic is coming.) Authors depend on you, they need to rely on the fact you know how to help make them successful. When they put their career in someone else’s hands and that pretend PA has no idea what a PA does, the author suffers – not you.
- Followers and Friends SELLS BOOKS! I call BULLSHIT!
You have 7,000 followers, maybe you have 100, or 20,000? Guess what? More than 3/4 of those followers have never bought a recommended book, or your author’s book. Some may have won a copy, but more than half of those never actually opened the book. <– Shocking, right? No, not shocking to those of us PA’s that live and breathe this thing called, “reality.” Followers don’t equal sales. Followers equal an increased potential of dick/boob/vagina pictures or people stalking you to talk bad about you. In some cases – maybe even try to help you fail.
- Pay. Pay. Pay. STOP WITH THE PAY Conversations!
$14 an hour as a PA? HAHAHA – It is a myth, sent from the delusional PA fairy, covered in unicorn dust and a wizard cloak. Get real, No PA is worth $14 an hour, 40 hours a week, 52 weeks a year. In that case, A PA needs to sell a minimum of 6 books a day, at $2.99 per book, 5 days a week, to even begin making profit for your author. That shit is im-fucking-possible – even for the best PA’s. AND, any indie PA that says it is possible – is a bullshit liar. Quote me
9 times out of 10 you don’t get paid. Just starting, feel special when your author sends you signed copies of their books, when they surprise you with a gift card, or maybe even more so when they brag about what an amazing PA they have. Can you make teasers, trailers, covers, set up events and organize them alone? Have you helped your author reach a goal they thought unattainable? What about blog tours, running street teams, or beta groups? But you want to be paid? Not only paid but paid 2-300 HUNDRED DOLLARS to run an event? Paid double minimum wage, while the author is putting every spare dime into their dream? Ha!
- Closing a giveaway and being PAID to do so. What a joke!
It’s not brain surgery or rocket science. It is finding a post and typing “CLOSED” on said post. Then… you make a form and post it in said giveaway, finally, addressing the winner; ten minutes tops. You save the giveaways your author posted, maybe five minutes, depending on how many giveaways posted. The next day you pick a winner, comment their name and tell them to fill out the form.
Giveaways closed. *psst – not worth $60 of your time. If this is that complicated – contact the website, we will be happy to show you how to do this in under 15 minutes*
- Bloggers. *Yes, we blog as well* — Stop making promises that you don’t intend to keep.
If you sign up to post a promo, do it. If you run a giveaway, close it and send the prize. You agree to review and to do it by a certain date? Do it. Just like anything else you do in life, you are accountable for your actions, or lack thereof. Life happens, we as adults know and understand that, so, work with us here…
What do you do if your aunt’s second cousin twice removed, on her ex-husbands side, had a dog that birthed puppies and you are the god parent? Of course, this made you unable to do what you signed up for, right? Shoot that author or promo company an email and let them know. Boom done. Don’t ‘forget’ or collect mobis from authors that count on you to give honest feedback for their work. This is more important than paying a underperforming/over-paid PA, I guarantee it.
PA’s – Stop being greedy as fuck.
Authors – Stop letting them be greedy as fuck.
*Following the posting of this article – one of the groups that were charging these prices and encouraging other PA’s to step up their prices to match theirs for a better competitive marketplace, was quick to request a deletion of the article and kick and block those of us that were members. I will say, other PA groups did not argue or become defensive to the nature of this article. Hmmm…. Opinions are not well received with this one, apparently. *